Trust

Jesus' warning: "Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves". The Bible teaches over and over, in the heart of man is evil, blackness, corruption. How true.

In God I trust, for all others I'm a skeptic. We live in an evil world people, the only person you can reliably trust is God. Any other trust is given at risk. Wisdom comes from managing the "risk to trust ratio" in your important associations. The more trust given, the higher the risk exposure. People will always disappoint, that's expected and allowable: it's just being human. However, when the breach of trust is by design or intentional for the other person's personal gain over your loss, that could be categorized as evil.

Everyone you know has their own reason for associating with you. To manage trust and risk, determine those reasons. Don't trust until you know those reasons. Early on in the association, disregard the reasons they or their friends proclaim. Look at what they ultimately want or receive from your association. The answer spans everything from sincere friendship and love to nothing but your cash. The association can be complex such as a marriage or simple such as a job. But, everyone is in it for something. Determine what that something is and you will have a good guideline of how much trust should be given. In a healthy association, there should be some form of healthy, mutual benefit.

Dishonest people are not likely to reveal what they want. It will typically be to their one sided benefit and masked. They are usually after some component of your wealth such as money, real estate etc... But, they also often seek power, control, ego massage, or any number of things. To hide their intent, they will often use deception, lures, complexity, distraction, manipulation, ambiguity, enticement, confusion, emotions, guilt, vagueness, excitement etc... That little voice in your head should tell you when something doesn't seem right, pay attention to it! If you have to convince yourself to do something you feel is against your best interest, you need to get away from the situation & regroup. If you see these things, it's safe to say you should probably vacate the association.

Honest people will sometimes tell you what they want but many don't even know. Plus, let's face it, wants & needs meander like a stream. Some people may be well meaning, but learned faulty behaviors such as deception, enticement, manipulation, etc... to get what they want. You then have to choose to school them or drop them. If you school them you can never trust them - keep them an arms length from what is important: a leopard doesn't change its spots.

Millions of people have been duped every year. Jesus' words were an important warning for all believers. Googling these keywords: religious "con artist" returns 30,000+ hits. We can see con artist prey on religious folks and the cons are abundant. If you think cons are not organized, check out this link: from attorneygeneral.delaware.gov (PDF). In that article, you'll see in the past three years alone over 90,000 Americans lost approximately $1.8 billion to in securities "God fraud" alone. Groups such as Christains are suspectable to a con called Affinity fraud.

In the Affinity fraud ("Miracle Cars") cited above, a simple online search would have revealed these cars were not in probate and didn't exist. Instead, all of these people in need couldn't pass up a deal too good to resist. If it seems too good to be true, consider it not true. In this example, desire trumped verifiable facts and cost millions.

Ok, I'm not a pure cynic. I'm not saying don't trust. I'm saying know who you trust . I have known a few very honest and good people; statistically speaking, they are rare on this earth. But, they are the most beautiful people I have known. To me, they are a gift to humanity from God. While they were here, they displayed a sampling of God's love while here on earth.

Random thoughts
  * As time passes, you get a more truer picture of what a person wants and if you can trust them.
  * Remember the stats, there are far more people who will take from you than there are who will give.
  * Listen to the little voice in your head telling you something is not right. It's there for a reason so don't squelch it.
  * DO NOT tell the other group about that little voice in your head. A con man will know how to squelch it
  * Never trust anyone with what is important, unless you have known for a long enough period of time..
  * If a nice sum of money is involved, get everything in writing, signed, and notarized. Trust no one, not even very long term friends. Make sure if it doesn't go right, you have a valid way to retrieve your money (valid escrow, etc...). I got conned from a 26 year family friend on this one, I'm not writing this page from high on an abstract perch, but from my own experiences.
  * If a church or preacher spends more than 1% of his time asking for money, I would find another church.
  * If a group takes an inordinate interest in your wealth, leave that place and never go back. These personal things are none of their business.
  * If someone is living much better than you and is asking your for money, don't give them any; they should be giving to you.
  * Never do unsolicited deals. If they contact you first, you will probably loss in the end.
  * If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is a fraud. Most people never give freely, they take.
  * Expect coworkers to eventually break your trust. Business is business and it's nothing personal,
  * Other than the helpless such as children, aging elders, etc, associations should not be one sided. Sometimes you give 75%, sometimes you get 75%, but it should average out to be near 55/45 over time.
  * We project our perception of ourselves unto others. Expunge the belief that people are like you: they are not. You cannot place too much trust in most people as they more than likely, are not as honest as you.
  * You will know them by their fruits. Every good tree brings forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree brings forth evil fruit

Facts - Determine and confirm the genuine facts
Common Sense - Through common sense, you can be convinced of anything
Imagination - A very powerful process that affects emotion which can cause action